One day at a time

Chris and I continue to take one day at a time. With Christmas right around the corner, I have a pit in my stomach as each day it comes near but I know Liam would want us to enjoy the season as if he was here! My heart continues to ache as each moment passes and I know that it will never go away. But I also now it's there to remind me of him until I get to see him again someday.
Going to the site where he is laid to rest is a place of peace that we visit everyday. So many come to visit and bring him new things and I am so very blessed that everyone loves him so much. Writing my blog was one of the best decisions I have made. Not only to help me cope with my feelings but to have all of you get to know him and love him so much. Our journey had so many ups and downs but everyday he was here with us on earth was the best days of my life. I am still not able to go back and read each post and relive it again but knowing its there to capture his life was a blessing in its own. I hope his life will help give comfort to someone else going through similar situations with a congenital heart defect or even someone else who has lost a child or even bring us all back to realize what is important in life. I never realized how many others have lost a child. My heart breaks for all of them since knowing how they feel. But they would probably all agree when I say.... Even though he is not here with us and I don't get to see him each day and watch him grow. I am still a mother to a beautiful baby boy. Even when Chris and I decide to try again to have more children he will always be our first and they will know everything about their big brother. If anyone asks if we have children I will always say yes. I never want to shut down and pretend none of it happened. I would do it all over again if I could.
Today Chris and are setting up a Christmas tree at Liam's site so he can experience the joy of this time of year. I also feel like it will remind Chris and I what Christmas is truly about.
Thank you to all that gives Chris and I the strength to get through our days.


This was posted on my blog and I love it. Thank you to whoever sent it. These are the things that help me cope. Love from all of you and love from our God above!!

What makes a Mother

I thought of you and closed my eyes And prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother And I know I heard him say.
A Mother has a baby This we know is true.'
But God, can you be a Mother When your baby's not with you?
Yes, you can, He replied With confidence in His voice
I give many women babies When they leave is not their choice.
Some I send for a lifetime And others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb But there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this, God I want my baby here
He took a breath and cleared His throat And then I saw a tear.
I wish I could show you What your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile With other children and say:
"We go to earth to learn our lessons Of love and life and fear.
My Mommy loved me oh so much I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a Mom Who had so much love for me
I learned my lesson very quickly My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much But I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep On her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek And whisper in her ear.
"Mommy don't be sad today I'm your baby and I'm here."
So you see my dear sweet one Your children are ok
Your babies are here in My home And this is where they'll stay.
They'll wait for you with Me Until your lesson is through.
And on the day that you come home They'll be at the gates for you.
So now you see what makes a Mother It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of Right from the very start.
Though some on earth may not realize
You are a Mother until their time is done.
They'll be up here with Me one day And you know you're the best one!



Posted by Anonymous to Our Superhero's Journey at November 24, 2012 3:44 AM